May Manifesto: Start Before You’re Ready

If you’ve ever felt the pangs of perfectionism or the fear of failure, this post is for you (and me!).

 

Start

Before

You

Are

Ready

 

You will never be fully ready.

Action (especially new action) is always scary, but it’s almost always way less frightening than our minds make it up to be.

So, it’s now a new month (yay for May!).

What one action could you take, TODAY, that will bring you one step closer to who you want to BE in the world?  (hint: choose that thing that makes your heart beat a little faster 😉

Here’s my challenge/invitation to you:  Do that thing!

As for me, I’m hosting a new workshop in three weeks. I’m scared. I don’t feel ready (at all). I don’t feel like I have enough knowledge. I don’t even know if anyone will come. But I’m doing it anyway. 

If this post inspires you, share what YOU will do in the comments below. I’d love to support you as you stretch into new territory, as well as have some courageous comrades along the way this month 🙂

Let’s do this!

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Learning to speak in my own voice.

“The rule says that in order for an individual to master any complex skill, be it brain surgery or playing the cello, she must put in 10,000 hours of focused practice. […] But what exactly are we learning when we’re beating our brains out all those years? […] What these masters were learning was to speak in their own voice. They were learning to act as themselves. In my opinion, this is the hardest thing in the world.

– Steven Pressfield

Like Steven Pressfield, I also feel like it’s the hardest thing in the world to learn to speak in my own true voice; that is, to truly become who I am (as ironic as that sounds).

And, the fact that Western culture does a fantastic job of taking us away from our inner knowings and intuitions doesn’t help much, either. With it’s hyper-focus on business (busy-ness), capitalism and productivity, is actually seems like Western culture is designed to make us forget our own unique way of being in the world…our purpose.

In speaking about purpose and Western civilization, depth psychologist, wilderness guide and cultural change agent Bill Plotkin articulates it this way:

“The near absence of attention to this most essential realm of purpose is not a coincidence or an oversight. For millennia, Western civilization, among others, has shaped itself in ways that suppress access to this realm. Today this realm of purpose is rarely experienced — or even consciously recognized as a possibility. Our educational, media, and religious systems and our mainstream parenting practices are shaped in ways that divert us from this vital domain of human experience. This suppression of human development has become a necessity for Western civilization in its current form; it would simply not be sustainable otherwise. Conversely, widespread access to this realm of purpose would be the single most potent factor in the termination of Western society in its present life-destroying iteration — and in the creation of a just, life-enhancing, and deeply imaginative culture with its roots in the genuine achievements of the Western tradition.”

(italics are mine)

Plotkin’s point –  that Western society would not be able to continue functioning in the way it has been if we all had access to this realm of purpose – is a very intriguing one. Why would Western society fail if we all turned toward our unique purpose? Because, the forces of Western culture are currently designed to influence us in ways that are best for the industrial growth machine – not for a healthy culture. The current forces support capitalism at all costs and a healthy “bottom-line,” rather than a healthy culture, planet and her people. So, if we all suddenly began to honor what was true within us (rather than bought what is “fed” to us from our consumeristic culture), the industrial growth machine would suffer. And it needs us to keep buying into it (literally and figuratively) in order to survive.

For me, Plotkin’s perspective about turning toward my unique purpose (and away from the influences of mass Western society) returns my power from “out there” to “in here,” and inspires me to keep tuning my ear to hear that still, small voice within.

While I’m still very much on the path of my own “10,000 hours,” the longer I keep walking without giving up or turning down a different road, the more rewarding my practice becomes (in my case, my practice centers around listening to the heart and soul of others as clearly as I can and helping them them live into their soul purpose).

Conversely, in those moments when I don’t listen to myself and instead pursue outward measures of what my life “should” look like or what “success” is, I can say honesty that I never feel any happier, more successful or more fulfilled. On the contrary, I wind up feeling emptier and like I’ve sold out on myself.

And while I’m still learning ALL THE TIME about listening within and really trusting what I hear, I’d like to hope that as I do so, I am slowly becoming more of who I really am.

 

To get good at anything takes a long, long, LONG time. It takes effort. It takes heart. It takes making mistakes, failing, learning, and getting back up and doing it all over again. It takes an inner commitment to whatever it is in us that drives us to pursue our longing. But if that longing is true, we can’t NOT pursue it.

So. Let’s plant our flags. Let’s speak in our true voices. Let’s follow that still, small voice within.

What else is there to do, really?

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“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”
– Steve Jobs, Stanford University commencement speech, 2005

Start Close In, by David Whyte

START CLOSE IN

 

Start close in,
don’t take the second step
or the third,
start with the first
thing
close in,
the step
you don’t want to take.

Start with
the ground
you know,
the pale ground
beneath your feet,
your own
way to begin
the conversation.

Start with your own
question,
give up on other
people’s questions,
don’t let them
smother something
simple.

To hear
another’s voice,
follow
your own voice,
wait until
that voice
becomes an
intimate
private ear
that can
then
really listen
to another.

Start right now
take a small step
you can call your own
don’t follow
someone else’s
heroics, be humble
and focused,
start close in,
don’t mistake
that other
for your own.

Start close in,
don’t take
the second step
or the third,
start with the first
thing
close in,
the step
you don’t want to take.

Quietly Given Gifts: The Story of My First Vision Fast (Vision Quest)

In the spring of 2014, I found myself alone and starving in the desert, completely exposed to the elements.  I hadn’t eaten for days – three days to be exact – and I was weak.

I’d paid good money for this.

I was on my vision fast.

Now, if you’re like most people, at this point you’re asking, “A vision what?”

What IS a Vision Fast/Quest?

The ceremony of the vision fast (or more commonly called vision quest) is a physically intense, spiritually-rich ceremony that’s been enacted by people all over the world for hundreds of years.

Maddisen Krown, executive coach and fellow vision quester, wrote a wonderful article for The Huffington Post that does a great job of explaining what quests are and why one would choose to do one.  Here she describes what a vision quest is:

“The term “vision quest” was first coined by 19th-century anthropologists to describe the rite-of-passage ceremonies of certain Native American cultures. Traditionally, these rituals have been performed to mark significant life transitions or changes. Generally speaking, they are seen as both personal and collective events that are guided and witnessed within the community, and often involve the “quester” spending time alone in nature in search of a personal vision that becomes a vision to support the entire community. An important vision quest, for example, is one that marks the passage of adolescents into adulthood.”

A traditional Native American Vision Quest consists of a person spending one to four days and nights secluded in nature, typically with very minimal shelter.  The idea behind this is to make oneself as available to nature as possible.  In this way, the “quester” is fully exposed to the magnificent and mysterious forces of the natural world, and also to the whisperings of her owl soul.  The quester also goes without food, and sometimes water, as a way to empty herself out and alter her consciousness, in hopes of receiving a “vision” to bring back to her community.

My First Fast

My first vision fast was held just outside of Capitol Reef National Park (Utah), during which time I spent three days and three nights out in wild nature – and also out in wind, sleet, rain and sunshine.

And, while I intellectually knew that nothing REALLY BIG and MYSTICAL would likely happen out there (that is, White Calf Medicine Woman probably would not descend from the heavens and bestow the vision of my life upon me), I still secretly held hope that SOMETHING would happen out there; that SOMEHOW I’d find the answers to the burning questions I’d been carrying around in my heart. Questions like, What am I here to do, really?  What is my soul here to give?  What is my life for?

So, on my first day out, I sat down on a log and began to rattle.

Now – before I go on I must say this:  there is A LOT of time when you are out on the land, not eating, for three days and nights.  As such, there are many ways to pass that time:  write in your journal; fix your tarp; look at the mountains in the distance; fix your tarp again (because it’s incredibly windy up on the ridge you’re on, and you really cannot fathom what possessed you to place your camp HERE of all places. But oh well – here you are); find a good sitting spot; walk around; drink lots of water and subsequently pee a lot.  You also get creative: at one point, I was so hungry that I even drew a picture of a raspberry scone and steaming hot cup of coffee in my journal with my blue ballpoint pen, just to make myself feel better.

However, there are also moments of deeply meaningful rituals; moments when you talk with the tress and the lizards and feel them as your kin; moments when you see meaningful images in the immense star-filled sky above; moments when you feel that the mere fact of your own humanity is truly astonishing.

Back to the rattle, though:  there I was, rattling away, when out of the corner of my eye I saw something move.  I turned to my left, and there, just a few feet away was a snake winding it’s way through my camp.

Now, as any good soulful vision faster would likely do, I got down on my hands and knees and attempted a conversation with it (Note: it can be seen as a real blessing when an Other comes to pay you a visit. Also, the fact that it was a snake was personally poignant, as I’d been seeing Snake almost every single time I went out in nature for the past year).

You might imagine, then, that I’d have been delighted to see this beautiful creature!  In all honesty, however, in that moment, I didn’t really make much of it.  My conversational attempts with it were short, as it slithered quickly through my camp.

After three days, the end of my solo time approached and as far as I could tell, that was the one thing that had “happened”during my time out.  As I made my way back to “the village” on the last morning, I felt a mixture of relief, joy, and also some disappointment that I didn’t get the BIG ANSWER I’d been hoping for.

The Return

The morning of my return, I crossed back over the threshold and returned to my group of fellow fasters (when one begins the vision fast ceremony, they cross a threshold of some kind to mark their departure from the “village”.  When they return, they once again cross back over a threshold. These thresholds act as psychospiritual markers and consciousness shifts for our psyches, telling a deeper part of us that we’re moving into or out of ceremony).

Once back, I was handed an avocado with salt on it (after fasting, you need a simple food to “break” your fast).  OH MY GOD was it good (to this day, it ranks as THE BEST avocado I’ve ever eaten in my entire life).

When we were all properly fed, the group then gathered together once again. It was now the moment when we’d each get to be witnessed by our human community in telling the story of our fast.

As I sat there and listened to magnificent story after magnificent story from my fellow questers, I felt less and less eager to share.  My mind kept saying,  “But nothing happened to you out there!!! You went out and came back with nothing!  You were dreaming about scones of all things!”  In short, a part of me felt like I’d failed.

When I was called into the circle, I told my story.  I shared about Snake (no one else had seen ANY sort of creature besides me).  I shared about my unanswered questions, as well as my deep pride for having enacted this physically demanding ritual at all.  I shed tears of both grief and release.  I was witnessed.

At the end of my share, one of my guides (Bill Plotkin) selected and read a poem to me (one that has since made it’s way into my bones):

 

Beyond the Question

by May Sarton

The phoebe sits on her nest

Hour after hour,

Day after day,

Waiting for life to burst out

From under her warmth.

Can I weave a nest for silence,

Weave it out of listening,

Listening,

Layer upon layer?

But one must first become small,

Nothing but a presence,

Attentive as a nesting bird,

Proffering no slightest wish,

No tendril of a wish

Toward anything that might happen

Or be given,

Only the warm, faithful waiting,

Contained in one’s smallness.

Beyond the question, the silence.

Before the answer, the silence.

 

Today

As I look back now, what “happened” on my vision fast was far more subtle and profound than I could have understood then.  That time began the initiation of the girl of me into the adult of me, which is what I’ve been living into ever since.

Since my fast I’ve also been learning the value of deep, dark, uncomfortable, sometimes agonizing patience.  The kind of patience that my soul is comfortable with, but that my mind can’t bear or even comprehend.  The kind of patience it takes to watch a plant grow, or the landscape change, or the earth move around the sun.

My next Vision Fast

I will be going on my next fast in just a few day from now.  I will again be going out with prayers in my heart, and questions.  But this time, I also go with patience.

These days, I know that I cannot demand the answers.  I cannot demand my soul to move faster than it will.

Over the past few years, I’ve often found solace in these words of Rilke:

“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.”

 

As I stand at the threshold once again, I go with my heart open, my prayers offered up, and with my good friend patience at my side.

“…But one must first become small,

Nothing but a presence,

Attentive as a nesting bird,

Proffering no slightest wish,

No tendril of a wish

Toward anything that might happen

Or be given,

Only the warm, faithful waiting,

Contained in one’s smallness.

Beyond the question, the silence.

Before the answer, the silence.”

 

I think I’ll be a snail now.

I admit it.  I’m totally THAT person sometimes. You know the one: the person who’s sitting in front of the computer, eating something, watching something else, toggling through web pages researching something else, and, oh –  maybe even talking on the phone with someone about something else.

Sometimes I name this state of multitasking “being busy”, “productive” or “getting things done.”  When I’m in this mode (which, unfortunately, is more often than I’d wish) and my husband asks, “How was your day?”, I hear myself list off ALL THE THINGS I got done, as if it’s a badge of honor I wear, and the longer the list, the bigger the badge.

When I’m getting things done, crossing things off my to-do list, going a million miles an hour and BEING REALLY PRODUCTIVE, I feel, well, worthwhile and valuable, like I’m making some sort of worthy contribution to the world (and, as any self-employed individual knows, there are MANY, MANY moments of self-employdom where you’re not sure if  what you’re doing is making any iota of difference in the world at all – in fact, many days you’re actually pretty convinced that it’s not. You regularly face the fear that your business is just some delusional fantasy of one, and that the rest of the human race is DOING REALLY GREAT STUFF and MAKING A DIFFERENCE.  But I digress).

A greater part of me knows that my productivity is not what makes me valuable. I’m valuable, well, because I just am. Because we all just are. We are all inherently valuable, worthwhile beings.

So as I was vacuuming today (vacuuming is when some of my BEST ideas come), I had an awareness:  What if, just what if, my REAL work is to slow down more… to slow down so much, in fact, that it might even appear to the world as if I’m not moving, or not being productive (gasp!). And then I thought about how easy it is to NOT slow down, to just keep going BECAUSE THAT’S JUST WHAT YOU DO. However, when I keep pushing forward and try to keep up (with who? with what?), those still, small voices and wise intuitions just fade into the background, like small seeds waiting for the right conditions to sprout.

And what if I NEVER slowed down enough to really hear what those seeds were?  What if I went my whole entire life just PUSHING ONWARD, never slowing down enough to really LISTEN?  It might just be that a gift – my gift, my contribution – to the world could be lost forever, in the mix of some unimportant multitasking.

I then wondered, if instead of trying to MAKE STUFF HAPPEN all the time (which, as a small business owner, feels like one-half of the equation most days), what if my REAL, honest-to-god work right now is to get even quieter inside, to slow down even more, so that the truth of my work – the truth of me – can emerge.

Hmmmm…

It occurs to me that the harder path (for me, many times, anyway) is often the slower path.

Yet it’s the slow path which, in many ways, is the path of the soul, and is the most rewarding journey in the long run.

elayn_yscvg-erwan-hesry

Our wounds are our medicine.

When I was in high school, I had an eating disorder. I was a compulsive overeater; I binged as a way to help me cope with what I wasn’t able to feel or deal with emotionally.

But I didn’t know this in high school. I just thought that I was fat and lazy and had a discipline problem with cookies and cereal, and that I just needed to get some CONTROL and lose weight. And THEN I’d be happy.

When I began to gain weight from my eating habits – which, as a teenage girl in southern California, was excruciatingly painful –  I felt so much shame, embarrassment, and self-hatred.

I felt like a lazy person who just couldn’t get it together enough to motivate herself to get skinny. I criticized myself all the time, telling myself that if I could just be more disciplined, then I’d be better.

During this time, I also felt totally isolated and alone. I felt like if I told anyone about my “problem”, they’d simply judge me as lazy or undisciplined… exactly the way I was judging myself.

PASTY DIET PILLS

So, instead of talking about it, I just put my poor teenage body through an array of strict diets.  One I remember very clearly involved eating nothing but 20 pasty “chocolate” diet pills every other day, while on the “non-pill” days you could eat actually food, but only SUPER healthy food like rice cakes and celery. Needless to say, it was horrible.

However, the worse part by far of my binge-starvation-binge cycle was my ultra harsh,  uber critical inner dialogue: “Ughhh. You’re so fat and disgusting. No one will ever like you. I don’t even like you. Why can’t you get your act together? Why can’t you just be skinny like everyone else?  What’s wrong with you?”

I remember telling myself that while I wasn’t good enough NOW, once I lost weight (got “skinny”), THEN I’d be happy / get the guy / be popular / have a life.

BUT (and this is a big but) – no matter how many starvation diets I put myself on, no matter how much I criticized myself in an effort to change, no matter how many plans I made to exercise my way to skinny, none of it ever worked. 

OVERCOMING OVEREATING

At some point after high school, I found an unpresuming little book called Overcoming Overeating. Despite it’s boring, very not flashy cover (unheard of in today’s book market!), this book was revolutionary for me:  it introduced me to the concept of being kind to myself and accepting myself no matter what.

I remember one chapter talking about our cravings. The authors were saying that if you love chocolate milkshakes and just want a chocolate milkshake, rather than depriving and berating yourself for wanting one, to instead give yourself as many chocolate milkshakes as you want – just don’t berate yourself.

HOLD UP JUST ONE MINUTE THERE, PARTNER… WHAT?!?!?!  Not berate myself?

Now you have to understand this:  I had always criticized myself for something.

I was either telling myself I was too fat, too shy, not pretty enough, not smart enough, not popular enough, not good enough, etc. (the list was endless). And a that point in my life, I believed that the only way I would ever change was by being strict and demanding with myself, using judgment and criticism as my motivation to change. But the thing was, being critical of myself NEVER helped me get to where I wanted to be. I only grew more depressed and less motivated the more I beat myself up.

SELF-KINDESS IS QUEEN

For the first time ever, I entertained the idea of actually trying to be nice to myself.  Like consciously nice!  

At first, this was NOT easy. It felt strange and awkward, like learning to rollerblade (oh yes – I’m a product of the 90s). Not to mention extremely FAKE.

But slowly, almost imperceptibly, things inside me began to shift.

Very slowly, I began to feel differently toward myself. I started to actually notice when I was being mean to myself, and then would try on a nicer attitude (this took time). I began to then notice a softening toward myself, from myself.  This was huge!!!

In this way, I very slowly began to cultivate a different relationship with myself on the inside. And as a result, my eating habits slowly began to shift, too.

So how is this the backstory for why I decided to become a life coach?

Well, my early challenges with food started me on the 20+ year path of personal growth and inner investigation that I find myself on today.

I know first-hand what it’s like to feel alone, ashamed, isolated, depressed and unsure of how or if I’ll ever “get there”. I also know what it’s like to have a very harsh inner critic, and also how to work with that part so that it doesn’t sabotage my life and my efforts any longer.

TRUTH:  We don’t have to criticize ourselves in order make changes in our lives. In fact, it’s much easier (and much more fun) when we love ourselves first!

As Lucille Ball put it, “Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”  AMEN!

OUR WOUNDS ARE OUR MEDICINE

My path with food has definitely been a journey, and a teacher.

I can now honestly say that I feel blessed to have had this challenge as part of my “spiritual curriculum” in this lifetime. For truly, if it wasn’t for what I’ve been through, I wouldn’t be who I am today.

I am a life coach now because of my desire to share what I’ve learned about how loving oneself first is a huge key to living a truly fulfilled and fulfilling life, from the inside out.

While the world would have us believe that if we change things on the outside we will  then feel differently on the inside (i.e., buy more stuff, make more money, etc), I don’t actually believe this is the case.

When we first make shifts on the inside, we tend to find that things in our “outer” lives shift as well.

Or, as my teachers, succinctly say, “Outer reality tends to mirror our inner experience.”

I won’t work on your problems.

I want my next business card to read, “I won’t work on your problems, but I’ll teach you how to fish.”

It’s not because I particularly love to fish (although I am a Pisces and I do love being outside near rivers and lakes), or that I dislike people with problems. I mean, as a life coach, that’s my daily territory!

You can find plenty of coaches, therapists, and healers who will help you with your problems.

But not me.

Nope. I’m leaving that bag behind, and here’s why:

The more I focus on what’s “wrong,” broken, or otherwise in need of “fixing” in you (or, if I believe you when you say “I can’t because…”), the less close you actually get to standing forward as the fully capable, beautiful, whole and imperfectly perfect human being you are.

Instead, as a Soul-Centered Coach and Guide to Wholing and Self-healing (terms which I’ll unpack shortly), I will and do wholeheartedly support the cultivation of people’s innate human wholeness. And surprise surprise! This approach actually works wonders on problems.

Uh, ok. So what the heck is “Wholing”? 

Glad you asked! Allow me to ‘splain, Lucy.

First of all, the word “whole” isn’t typically used as a verb. However, as I’m talking about creating wholeness here, I am defining “wholing” as this:  The act of creating completeness, integrity, soundness, strength and cohesion in a human being.

In his book, Nature and the Human Soul, Bill Plotkin talks about two different approaches to psychological issues:

“There are two general approaches to alleviating psychological problems: pathology-centered and wholeness-centered (holistic). Using the pathology approach, we ask, “What symptoms of dysfunction is this person exhibiting, and what can be done to eliminate these symptoms and/or this dysfunction?” Common psychological symptoms include anxiety, depression, obsessions, eating disorders, addictions, and mania. A shallow version of the pathology approach simply attempts to eliminate or suppress the behavioral, somatic or emotional symptoms. A deeper approach tries to understand the psychodynamics of the dysfunction and then foster healing by addressing deeper causes.

All pathology approaches begin and end with a symptom focus: you don’t know what, if anything, is needed until symptoms appear, and you don’t know your intervention has succeeded until the symptoms diminish.

… With the holistic approach, in contrast, dysfunction is not a central focus. We ask instead, “What qualities or capacities are missing from this person’s embodiment of wholeness, and what can be done to cultivate these qualities or capacities?” The goal is to encourage and foster something functional and fulfilling rather than to remove something dysfunctional and deadening. Missing psychological qualities might be, for example, innocence, wonder, body awareness, nature reverence, creativity, and the development of values and virtues. Capacities of wholeness include social skills, cultural knowledge, emotional and imaginal skills, conflict resolution, and self reliance.”

(italics are my own, not the author’s)

As a human development professional, rather than focusing on what people feel needs “fixing” in them, I’ve witnessed the emboldening effects that occur while focusing on their innate strengths instead.

In my experience, overly focusing on the former seems to send the message to people that they’re somehow not capable of solving their problems themselves. Said another way, it encourages people to remain in more of a victim position rather than cultivating their innate capacities and strengths (aka, wholeness).

We all see this in other ways, too. For example, when someone comes up with an idea or solution on their own, they’re far more likely to adopt it or embrace it, as opposed to being told what to do.

Learning to Fish (aka, Cultivating Wholeness)

There’s an old saying:

Give a Man a Fish, and You Feed Him for a Day. 

Teach a Man To Fish, and You Feed Him for a Lifetime.

Wholeness-centered, or wholing, work is about teaching people to fish, which is to say, it’s about helping one become fully resourced in their own innate strengths, capabilities, talents, and skills.

Wholing work, as Plotkin mentioned, can include things like: conflict resolution skills, emotional skills, assertiveness skills, cultivating one’s sense of wonder in and for the natural world, body-centered awareness, self-reliance skills, etc.

Practically speaking, when I focus on wholing with my clients, my own center of gravity shifts. I move from a stance of “You need help with this” to “You’ve got this!”, which in turn produces a shift in how they relate to themselves (namely, they too start to feel that they’ve got this!).

As someone who also actively gets coaching and mentorship in this model, I can truly say that it’s incredibly empowering and enlivening to be held as the naturally creative, resourceful and whole human I am.

But what about REAL problems?  Healing vs. Self-Healing 

At this point you might be thinking, ‘Yes, that’s great and all, but there ARE instances when people really do need help and they do need to look at the broken or hurt parts inside themselves.’ Absolutely. I agree 100%.

Traditionally, healing is about tending to what’s broken, hurt or wounded in another. And there are certainly times when we may be in need of this kind of attention and care. That’s traditionally where a great psychotherapist comes in.

Alternatively, in the holistic model, we bring in the concept of Self-healing (with a capital “S” referring to the whole, fully resourced Self… or, one could say the Big Self as opposed to the small self).

Simply put, Self-healing is about tending to ourselves from our wholeness (or from our fully resourced and centered Self), rather than “getting healed” by another. It’s also about learning how to embrace our protective parts (aka, our sub-personalities) when we’ve been hijacked by them, welcoming them back into the fold of ourselves.

Self-healing (as opposed to leaning on someone else’s wholeness in order to feel stronger) has been extremely empowering for me. I’ve grown from the inside out in a myriad of ways, and in ways that I just couldn’t have had I been leaning on someone else for my “answers”.

Self- healing is a simple (though not necessarily easy) way of loving the parts inside of us that feel hurt, scared, scarred, mad, rejected or otherwise protective. And when done in conjunction with wholing work, it can have remarkably empowering effects.

Fishing

As I mentioned earlier, as a Soul Centered Professional Coach and Guide to Wholing and Self-Healing, I won’t work with you on your problems or what you think needs “fixing” in you (although, I’m sure that you can find plenty of people to pay to do that).

Instead, if you’re ready to stop talking about your problems and really lean into your own growing edges; if you’re ready to really know and feel yourself as the naturally creative, capable, resourceful and fully alive human being you innately are, let’s talk.

You’re ready to learn to fish.

ysvemcvg9ie-boriskin-vladislav

Photo: Boriskin Vladislav